ATHEIST IS AWESOMIST

Hey if the above image doesn't stir up some action in your junk region, see a balls doctor. It's the cover of Atheist's forthcoming Live At Wacken set (with bonus disc of essential Atheist tracks) and yes it combines elements (wink) of their other covers. This guy Metal Chris is the nicest dude like ever but he insists that Atheist is stealing credit due to Chuck Shuldiner and Death's technical thrash records; sorry no sale. I love Death and those records are killer but from its perch, Unquestionable Presence craps on everything past or present. This coming from a guy who had sex with a Cephalic Carnage CD. And now this coming from Kelly Shaefer, lefty guitarist/pot enthusiast:

It's a very stripped-down, no-overdubs live recording from our appearance at Wacken Open Air in 2006 as part of the reunion dates we did. This was only the fourth show on what would become many. So why record the fourth show? Well, we did not actually ever intend on it, but we found out that Wacken had raw tracks that could be remixed, whereas most recordings we get are from soundboards, and you cannot turn up guitars, vocals etc on those type of recordings. So... we obtained the raw tracks and have mixed eight tunes in Atlanta. The results? A very very live (mistakes and all) and raw set of tracks from the Piece of Time and Unquestionable Presence era of Atheist. It sounds suprisingly warm, and for those who were there in Germany that afternoon to see Atheist on what was probably one of the more 'magical' performances we have ever had as a band, it was really the first time we had played for people who had been around back in the early days of the band, and were now writers, or owned record companies, plus all of the new fans of this strange technical metal genre of music... This will encapsulate that experience for us, you and as well as those who were not there that day... It was a great day!

Huh they should teach a PR class to Metal guys cuz Schaffer should not explain that the error-ridden live record exists as a matter of convenience. But it gets better, as a totally bacackled Schaeffer describes the Wacken audience (which seems older to him), the 'magical' set (which stands among their best to him?) and contextualizes Atheist (too humbly). Hey who left that awesome Atheist song down there? I bet that big gray arrow is a clue!

WE LIKE WE LIKE: CYNIC

Reunions aren't all bad. Sure, it's odious of bands to reform hastily and embark on rudderless tours in the name of legacy making or whatever. Especially since tours of America are so unprofitable so as to be an afterthought, a concession to legitimacy. Example: It's been years since Atheist began touring again, and I haven't even been in the same area code with one of the prog-metal greats' shows. Who can blame them. Europe deserves Metal more.

Speaking of Florida prog-metal, Cynic is back in action after a brief and misfortune-laden career represented with one album, the jazz-metal masterpiece, Focus. (Sure, half of Cynic, with Steve DiGiorgio of Sadus, backed Chuck Schuldiner on Death's Human, the first of Schuldiner's tech-death metal masterpieces.) Those familiar with Cynic's story know of hurricanes, inherited debt, and injury standing between the band and even the modest renown earned by the aforementioned Atheist and Death. Judging from the album's trailer (above), that's all gonna change with long-awaited second album Traced In Air out October 27. Get some.

Don't Hate Me: Atheist's Kelly Schaefer

You're pretty much a certifiable idiot if you don't love Atheist. And so I figure there was a high number of dudes bummed out by Atheist frontman Kelly Schaefer's decision to don big pants, goofy sunglasses, and a freaking wallet chain in Neurotica. As Atheist is one of this nation's proudest achievements, it's fitting that today Schaeffer's back with Pyroclastic, whose four song demo downloads here. I know everybody's trying their very best but Neurotica's flimsy hard rock kinda grossed me out and Pyroclastic is dated, down-tuned groove metal with a shall we say unintentionally hilarious environmentalist bent. Oh look there's a guy named Shizz in it. 

Between The Buried And Me And Me

I've been running my fat mouth for some time about North Carolina quintet Between The Buried And Me. Hey man -- I had every right. First of all, they reeked opening for Dillinger Escape Plan. After the show, these two haircuts convinced me, a degenerate prog metal spaz, to give their Alaska album a shot. Strike two. The third strike came somewhere between the retarded covers album and discovery that their name derives from a Counting Crows lyric. It was like breaching the bra barrier and turning up toilet paper. Used toilet paper. Stink-palmed, I surprised even myself by pronouncing BTBAM dead on arrival and avoided the shit outta Alaska's roundly heralded follow-up, Colors. Oh what a fool I've been. A stupid, stubborn, silly man.

So we hereby present this HooM! Official Big Stinky Sincere Apology to Between The Buried And Me and their face-blasting 2007 album, Colors. BTBAM joins Rainbow, Enuff Z'Nuff, NBA Basketball, the beach, pot, and more in the HooM! Hall Of Contrition. 

We apologize. There.

So what happened: Metal dudes were telling me to check out Canadian prog-emoists Protest The Hero, who also found wholy justified patronage at Metal Sucks. PTH's new album, Fortress, is rad, I happily reported to Metal dudes. It was at this point that one Metal dude, while the others politely drifted away, told me in privacy that I was to stop being a dickmouth and get the goddamn fucking Between The Buried And Me album 'cause, as everybody knows, it is brilliant if I'd just unfuck myself for a minute. 

Which brings us to today, the day I heard Colors for the fourth time. About six gajillion prog-metal records have come out since 1993, but Colors excels in tone and pace at a level unattained since Atheist and Unquestionable Presence. Also like Unquestionable Presence, the fourth album by Between The Buried And Me strikes heavily and is arrestingly beautiful. But similarities halt there: Whereas Atheist defined boldness as uncloseted jazzletes/public potheads, BTBAM exists in a hyper-evolved musical climate that affords brave bands a needed measure of credibility to get all weird with disparate styles, and where guitars don't just play blinding, they play blindingly memorable mini-songs across passages neither hurried nor excessive in pace. That sentence was long as shit. Sorry.

Between The Buried And Me's Colors, the opposite of crappy