Showing posts with label Lita Ford. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lita Ford. Show all posts

7.14.2009

OK SAMBORA I FORGIVE YOU FOR THAT SOLO ALBUM



One gripe of which I never tire is the occasional House of Hair shows which consist of nothing but limp synth rock. Usually the Dee Snider-fronted weekly rocks, and when he's forced to play Bon Jovi it's followed with some snide (heh heh) remarks about office lady rock like BonJ. And yet I'd pretty much kill for Bon Jovi (above, truly meaningless music) on the wack-ass nights in question, when Snider spins naught but middle-aged moustache pop rock like late Deep Purple ("Point of no returrrrrn") and MSG ("Anytime anytie-yiiim you want may") and the heaviest it gets is gasp "The Final Countdown." It's hard to bail on the show cuz it's like my special time, but man Saraya is some wack shit. Did you ever this Lita Ford atrocity? Then it's "Burning Heart" by Vanderburg ugh.

But worst of all is the pseudo-Clapton honky blues of dreaded Bon Jovi guitarist Richie Sambora and his debut solo album Stranger In This Town sweet lord are you serious dude? It sounds like the Lethal Weapon 3 soundtrack with vocals, not the earthly and soulful storytelling of a mysterious drifter. His non-professional affairs aren't exactly endearing either, from the Locklear-Richards switcheroo to the DUI with kids in the car. But we at HooM! are here to say that Sambora is not a complete jackass as widely recorded. See, Bon Jovi (the high-singing dork) helped Skid Row, a real band, land a record deal but rudely cut himself and Sambora into the deal as publishers. I imagine Doc McGhee was involved judging from Sebastian Bach's reaction to his presence on VH1 SuperGroup. Anyway, what I'd never heard was that Sambora gave his share back to the band! Oh I mean from the unimpeachable Wikipedia:
After a big public dispute Richie Sambora gave his share of the money back to Skid Row.
So I guess Jon just threw his on the pile, huh. Maybe he could spend it on a set of testacles.


12.12.2008

HOPEFULLY LITA'S GONNA 'TAKE IT' MUAH HA HA



I have absolutely no fucking idea why, but Brooklyn Vegan has mad pictures from Twisted Sister's retarded holiday show in New York the other night. BV is the nationwide source for hipster douche-twists who front like they're part of the lame-ass NYC scene, which apparently includes some flabby, old drag queens and their canon of awful, awful songs. And that's not even considering their hideous cash-grab of a holiday album. 

The upshot of all this is another step in the re-emergence of Lita Ford, aka blue-ribbon spank material for rockers 1983 - 1991. Despite shitting out some kids and getting drilled by Tony Iommi, W.A.S.P. guitarist/class act Chris Holmes, and finally Nitro singer Jim Gillette (don't karate chop me), Ford hasn't given up on her bod, staying hot enough to pull off a um Santa-themed red vinyl and straps ensemble (above). Which made Dee Snider and crew that much uglier by contrast. Shit Eddie Trunk looks like an adonis next to those ghouls. Stop confusing my wang, freaks!