My life is a serene combination of peaches and herb so I know firsthand that yes, dreams come true. Like my dream that a motivated insane person will someday slap shut the shit-spewing mouths of Sharon Osbourne's husband or the guy who was too disagreeable to be in Metallica. Well, first Chris Brown was hip to the cause but totally missed his target, and instead rained blows down on foxy Rihanna. Ok innocent mistake. Though above all I value accuracy so I'm getting worried after a second offensive failed today, thanks to the dumbshit who apparently couldn't wait until Mustaine's book came out to strike him in view of a crowd. According to The Sun, which I edited the shit out of cuz UK tabloids write like sixth-graders:
The man, said to be in his late 20s or early 30s, waited in line for a signed copy of singer Leona Lewis'sess new book, Dreams, and then attacked her in front of 200 stunned onlookers. Lewis, shocked, clutched her face as bouncers apprehended and held the assailant until police arrived. A witness states: “The man waited patiently, but as soon as she signed his book, he smashed her in the face.
Huh at least this guy gets credit for rendering the book's title hilariously ironic. And Leona's cool, but maybe he was warming up, testing security, ya know casing the joint when he slugged a harmless pop singer. A soft target which prepares him for Mustaine's catlike speed and reflexes. I guess time will tell.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Sweet. I'm going to get backstage at the next Slayer show. When I meet Tom Araya I'm going to peel off his pants, grab his beanbag, and toss his Chilean salad like a maniac. Way better than beating on the old mummy.