Finally! A Victory For Drugs

People Magazine reports that CSI star Gary Dourdan, who was charged with three counts of felony drug possession after he was found passed out in his car early April 28, will skate on all counts. Oh wait, he'll be 'required' to complete a 16-class treatment program. 

Everybody knows CSI and its spin-offs are retarded, but this guy is totally metal! I mean, at the time of arrest, he was holding cocaine and ecstasy and heroin. The trifecta! And though he may've been facing three years in jail, he won't even serve three minutes! Yes! Now, it's true: He's a famous actor and is above the law. But I'm counting it, folks. Yay drugs! 

Here's a picture of the goofball enthusiast:

I think I sold this guy two dimebags in Loring Park last month. See? When celebrities evade the draconian laws which mangle the lives of mortals, we all win!