6.11.2008

You Fail Me: BulletBoys' Marq Torien


Actor Mark Wahlberg proved that even celebrities aren't immune to the power of my mind as he publicly lashed out Wednesday at neighbor David Beckham, soccer douche. From Stuff:

When asked if he had met [Beckham], Wahlberg joked: "No, but that fucker lives down the road from me, man! He has to go back to the UK, because he has paparazzi all over my house."

He added: "I was in the UK for the last week and they don't want him back. They said, 'Keep him over there'."

Looks like the HooM! plot to annihilate Beckham is picking up steam. For an encore, I'm going to have Wahlberg crap on the man-boobs of Marq Torien, singer of formerly awesome boner-rock quartet BulletBoys, whose just-released single could be charitably described as corporate bullshit for Staind-loving tampons. A harsh punishment, yes. But the real BulletBoys legacy must be protected. 
Neither Bullet Nor Boy: Marq Torien, pre-Wahlberg Steamer

1 comment:

Brainhammer! said...

I have never been 100% about this guy. Dont get me wrong, "Smooth Up In Ya" is pure poetry, but he spells his name with a Q and his face has always struck me as vaguely Stoltz a la Mask-ish...a movie that scared the wholly hell out of me as a child. Same goes for Liv Tyler--as long as we're at it--I've always perceived the faint whiff of Down Syndrome. Trust me, I am frightening adept when it comes to detecting dysfunction.