There's lotsa good shit going down on Dee Snider's fantastic syndicated House Of Hair program. Sure, Dee spends way too much time pumping his own (awful awful) band. And whoa he's constantly working to indoctrinate younger generations, practically brainwashing post-grunge people to dump money into '80s hair rock. C'mon Dee, the health of Metal depends on new bands, new styles, new music -- it's already annoying enough to have Aerosmith, Alice Cooper, and Motley Crue straight-up begging for relevance. That said, it's nice to see unsung (ugh sorry) greats benefit from Dee's push: The music of Junkyard, Badlands, BulletBoys, and Lynch Mob deserves to be dropped on fresh sets of ears. Plus, Dee's HOH tribute to Quiet Riot's Kevin Dubrow was really nice, no bullshit.

Of course, some retro-rock is best viewed through rose-colored lenses; once you hear, say, Accept ("Balls To The Wall"), Loudness ("Rock 'N Roll Crazy Nights"), or The Scorpions (all) with a discerning ear, you realize that some shit is fucking retarded. Or that Motley Crue's cover of "Smokin' In The Boys' Room" is the gayest song of all time. It was originally recorded by (giggle) Brownsville Station. (Sounds like the bathroom where Republicans choke down random dong.) I've been to ahem 'Brownsville' a few times and it was never in the boys' room. Good choice, Dikki Lixx. Everybody knows wang-smoking's not allowed in school.

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