2.02.2009

UNVITATION TO LOVE



Like most Metal guys who act all belligerent, I love Love and relish the excuse to play the big gooey romantic occasionally. That’s not to say I don’t feel chump-ish penning lovey birthday cards or quoting Rimbaud while pouring champagne, but worse crimes have been perpetrated in the name of possibly maybe potentially getting a blowjob at the movies. Or naked ping pong. The sky’s the limit.

So anyway, I blew all my goddamn money on a fancy gift (rhymes with ShmyShmod) but before I could give it to my girlfriend while unzipping my pants suggestively, her rat-bastard cock-blocking friends beat me to the punch. Foiled! Now she has two fucking iPods, one for each record she owns. Which reminds me -- I even loaded up the motherfucker with good tunes before painstakingly repacking it like new. Y’know, so she wouldn’t have to chase down all those hard-to-find Van Halen records herself.

Speaking of Van Halen, they are a band according to guitarist Eddie Van Halen. Let's spare ourselves the world's flimsiest press release copy (by EVH's future wife) and get to the info. Ed tells AOL's Spinner.com:
Dave, Wolfie, Alex and I are a band. I hope that after Janie and I get married and Wolfie graduates [from high school] that we sit down and discuss recording new music, which I have tons of. If Dave's up for singing ... then do another tour, and just see where it takes us. Actually, next week or the week after, Wolfie, Alex, and I are gonna start jamming. Maybe we'll give Dave a call and see what he's up to. He's off, always doing his own thing, and he checks in every now and then to see how we're doing.
Ha maybe he'll invite Dave to the sessions. Feel the love folks, cuz this is about as warm as EVH gets with regards to DLR. It's not like Dave needs to watch them jam; the singer usually just sits there while the song gets worked out anyway. It's the thought that counts. The back-handed, belittling, arrogant thought. 


No comments: