JUST DO PORN ALREADY

Don't get me wrong I'm all for Heidi Montag doing Playboy. Her bod is awesome, except for that her head's attached to it. Look at her retarded logic: She gives it away for free all the time, pointing her junk at pap cameras in poses that suggest her own private porno with an invisible dude. But now she wants to remove that last strip of fabric between herself and bald desperation (sorry) and expects a half-million dollar payday? She's asking for a raise of 500,000% if I'm doing my math right. Be reasonable, Spencer, you tragic nobody. Tell ya what penisface, I'll do $100 for a pic of her with my name suntanned onto her knocks. how's that. I'll throw in $20 to punch your front teeth out.