There's precious little gossip going around about the God Forbid situation, which finds founding guitarist Dallas Coyle precipitously departing the very band he formed in 1996 with his brother Doc. So it's been chewing me up inside; the shit is so damn Shakespearean. The other day, Dallas (sorry for first-naming) broke his silence in his MetalSucks column, but merely parroted a statement given earlier by Doc (sorry again). But there's a elephant in the closet or whatever that expression is. And that, friends, is the idea of his departure came right the fuck after God Forbid put out their well-hyped record, Earthsblood. The record that would not only be better than the bonerparty Constitution of Treason but successful as shit too. That's what the mood was; those who followed this album since it was titled TBA could sense that GF was gonna go all Lakers on Earthsblood, gunning for triumph in the shadow of a defeat last time around. Ok that last sentence mixed a few metaphors.
You can see where this is going. What I'm all angling at like a chickenshit is that Earthsblood isn't very good. I confess I'm extremely not proud nor spiteful to be pointing that out. I've been really patient with this record. Or something cuz I again listened to it all day and came away even more certain that Earthsblood does not represent a progression from CoT. Don't email me to call me a dick cuz I'm calling myself one but it's a Shadows Fall record to me: a record that is vaguely, unnamably nowhere. But boxers get knocked out in the first round sometimes. Shit Chicago's Ben Gordon was like 6 for 84 against the Celtics on Tuesday. My garbage can headbutted me in the sack this very morning. We all brick. These things happen.
Back to the Dallas thing. Focusing on the timing of events, do we not find it possible -- nay probable -- that Dallas' decision is intimately connected to the album, in one way or another? And if we make that ass(hole)umption, it's not a leap to the idea that he doesn't like the album. ????? I don't know though. He sounded pretty pumped about it. And the sales weren't bad bad. Not enough to justify his robbing us of hope for a rebound masterpiece. Just come back Dallas. We can change. It'll be different this time. Dalllaaaaasssssssss.
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