Hey if your balls/boobs feel heavier today it's because HooM! is a big, veiny year old now. Yes it's Happy Birthday to HooM!; that was 365 days ago that a rage-based jerk found a employer-subsidized way to hurl insults at traitors of Metal and other dicklickers. It's been an eventful year since then and I've taken a few elbows to the groin. But that's my sacrifice for the honor of defending Metal with slander and thinly-veiled threats. One request: Hurry up and help my popularity explode so I get a host gig on a VH1 pop culture show AND a chance to pork Megan Hauserman. Dio says Dream Evil. I say Dream Naked, y'all. I remain your servant.