I got a few emails wondering about a perceived lack of HooM! enthusiasm about the finally-announced Testament tour. To which I respond hey my hands have been heh heh 'full' since this hot, sexy news hit the streets. Yeah it's impossible to type with your mitts feverishly working up and down a long, hard ... guitar while practicing songs likely to appear on the Testament setlist. You see, I have a Drebin-esque plan to meet Testament lead guitarist Alex Skolnick but suddenly look beyond him like there's something really interesting there. I feel a "What the..." will be a nice touch and as he turns BLAM right on the noggin. As a precaution, I removed sometime Skolnick replacement Glen Drover to a self-storage locker in Fullerton, where an elaborate device controlled by my mobile phone delivers regular electrical jolts to his balls. You too can participate by texting Shock Glen's Nuts to HooM! (4666). Anyway, at the show if you find that Skolnick seems a few inches shorter, visibly intoxicated, and a lefty, um that just means you're totally wasted, dude. Hey what's that behind you?

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