I alotted all of 90 seconds to researching Ozzy's family's retarded variety show (???) and from what I can tell, it only aired once? And a shit-ton of stations moved it to late night or eschewed it altogether, like a Milwaukee station that aired a drug awareness special instead. Apparently, Ozzy's on to his next project, a loudly public legal battle with one of Earth's awesomest people, former/current bandmate Tony Iommi. Sigh. From a statement too coherent to be composed by Ozzy:
As of the mid-1990s, after constant and numerous changes in band members, the brand of 'Black Sabbath' was literally in the toilet and Tony Iommi (touring under the name Black Sabbath) was reduced to performing in clubs. Since 1997, when Geezer [Butler, bass], Bill [Ward, drums] and myself rejoined the band, Black Sabbath has returned to its former glory as we headlined sold-out arenas and amphitheatres playing to upwards of 50,000 people at each show around the world. We worked collectively to restore credibility and bring dignity back to the name 'Black Sabbath,' which led to the band being inducted into the U.K. and U.S. Rock And Roll Hall of Fames in 2005 and 2006, respectively.
Constant and numerous changes? Do occurrences exist that are constant yet not numerous? And I think you mean changes to the band's roster, not changes in band members; I don't recall Tony Martin getting a sexual reassignment surgery or a sassy new dye job for Neil Murray. And fucking thanks for raping my eyes with the phrase literally in the toilet. So what you're saying is Tony Iommi's admittedly crummy (though not without highlights) '80s-'90s Black Sabbath outings all occurred in a toilet? That doesn't make sense. Maybe Ozzy did write this pile.

But seriously, I can't think of any Metal band that wasn't 'reduced' to playing clubs at some point in the 90s. Unless they strapped on a wallet chain or married into the American music industry old guard. Read it again, and you'll see that the quote above is an arrogantly undisguised list of things Ozzy's wife ostensibly did for the Black Sabbath brand. It's all about her marketing power, shamed and cowed as she must be in the face of Heaven And Hell's foaming critical and popular reception. And um retards? Bringing success to an organization doesn't entitle you to ownership. If that were the case, the Bark River Inn would owe me huge plus 15 years' interest. People came in droves for the cleanest plates in town. I heard Warrior Soul's "Shine Like It" for the first time in that kitchen and I still think of cole slaw.


HAUS said...

Sounds like the slave labor at the Bark River Inn never got free slices of the 3rd-best pizza in all of northwest Waukesha County. Jerks.

Billy Billy Billy said...

my teenager dishwashing gig owes me to for all the business i brought in.

but actually i cooked myself whole meals when the cool boss was around. and one night I submerged my entire head in the potato salad. let's call it even, Lakeside Lanes.

Anso said...

roger that. the delivery guy was like sub-moronic. the bosses were Cary and Gary.