Like eight awesome records are streaming on shitty, crash-causing MySpace sites and though I got a good look at The Mars Volta's new record at work, I don't really devote valuable office listening hours to anything heavier. To squares, even Voivod sounds like the beating of a baby with a cat. I talk the talk, so my co-workers are exceptionally knowledgeable about The Crown and Testament.
What I'm getting at is I want to crank the new Suffocation, Voivod, and Darkest Hour, and yes even those fruitcakes in Killswish Engayge get their day in court. But I don't cuz sheesh for some people it's hard to work with some guy(s) grunting. Though not rocking out, at least I can get some laughs reading Dino Cazares howlers. It's so disingenuous that he's suddenly all about Fear Factory. And I'd really like to enjoy a metal band with the shapely ass of Strapping Young Lad and the fat boobs of old Fear Factory, now known as Fuck Fucktory. But that's ruined by this sub-moronic public mudslinging.
Look, I get it; with Stroud and Hoglan, FF is supercharged. But this isn't the way to do it. In fact, why not just do FF with Wolbers/Hererra and simultaneously do the all-fatass Stround/Hoglan project, The Stubbly Doublechins. That way we all win and Burton Bell will never again need to bullshit us. And holy shit am I reading this right? did Cazares actually say I could sue [Wolbers] for stealing my riffs? That is fucking baby talk.