9.24.2009

NO COALESCE BONER


Ok fine you beat it out of me: I can't stand Coalesce. I've been half-fronting for years but it's time to come clean. That album of theirs 2112: Revolution Is Just Glistening in my collection? A promo. After a few listens in 1999, back to the shelf it went until its contents made sense. In the meantime, I nodded blankly during any Coalesce-related discussion and lent it to friends with vague and evasive endorsements (each hated it except Emily). And alas it never ended up making sense cuz the record is totally pointless, and there I said it. And I heard their bassist will take a dump on stage (above).

At this point, I'd apologize to the (superb) publicist who kindly sent me a copy like eight months after its press cycle but then again, here I am in print basically wearing his balls on my face. And shit now that I think about it, he's the one who made me listen to that rotten Coalesce album. I assume it was his skillz (and studly name) behind the tasteful campaign (balls on face) for their new record, Ox, and again my effort was solid but shit no foiled again I hate it. Ok laterz.


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