Even though Eddie Van Halen has been upsetting me on a full-time basis since 1996, I'm not going to raise any fundamental objections to his pursuit of happiness. We all want a healthy, happy Van Halen (the band) and if a ill-conceived marriage for Van Halen (the guy) will ensure that then so be it. From People:
Van Halen, 53, proposed to his girlfriend/publicist Janie Liszewski, 38, on Aug. 4 while they were vacationing in Hawaii. The rock guitarist dropped to one knee and popped the question in a private room at Tiffany's, a source close to the couple tells People. The couple plan to wed next June. 
Yikes. I'm fairly certain Ed hasn't laughed in a while, but he has seen This Is Spinal Tap, right? How long until Liszewski starts dressing the band as zodiac signs? It must be true love, since she's 38 and even cracked-out Ed could pull some younger tail to keep him company, but here's a tip from your pals at HooM! -- Don't marry someone with direct access to the media, especially if you're batshit insane. Liszewski already sold the exclusive on the proposal to People for the love of Jeff; stay tuned to HooM! as we bid on the break-up/out-of-the-closet/divorce settlement exclusive. 

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